I started to write this morning about my own Freaky Friday syndrome, not because I’ve switched life-roles (heaven forbid) with my son who’s two weeks into the college life, but because I’ve only managed to post something on the last three consecutive Fridays. Surely there’s symbolism in that somewhere, somehow, but I think I’ll spoil some therapist’s dream and choose instead to ignore a search for meaning in that odd pattern. Seems too coincidental to ignore, but between my back issues and the day job life has been unusually distracting from more important pursuits such as daily blog writing. After all, blog writing is where the big bucks are, right?

Consumed by the mystery of “why am I blogging only on three consecutive Fridays,” I invested oh, about 10 seconds pondering this enigma then decided to have breakfast instead: almond oats ‘n honey cereal with organic blueberries. I could mumble something about being able to think better on a full tummy, but the truth is my breakfast held more interest to me than the reasons behind an odd pattern of blog posting. Sometimes we need to just accept things as they are and not search for meaning. But one important realization did surface: I blog to keep my hand moving and my mind converting thoughts to form, and doing so only once a week provides little exercise of this yet too easily promotes lethargy, one of many banes of a writer’s existence. Hopefully, starting with this post, I’ll be back blogging consistently, unless that unopened package of organic raspberries in the freezer distracts me from my purpose. That may not be a good reason to avoid writing a morning blog post, but you have to agree it’s a tasty one.

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The OED defines motivation as “The (conscious or unconscious) stimulus for action towards a desired goal, esp. as resulting from psychological or social factors; the factors giving purpose or direction to human or animal behaviour.” and “The general desire or willingness of someone to do something; drive, enthusiasm.” Lofty words, but in essence, that which propels us forward doing something for some reason. The trick, as always, is to discover that “reason.”

I’m still working on fully discovering my motivation, but so far it appears that it falls into the “I want to be heard” and “I want to be challenged to think more deeply.” I don’t fall into the group that uses the “I must write or die” mantra, but I don’t knock anyone who thinks that’s their calling. Motivation is as vain and unreliable as a wandering lover’s eye. The only motivation one can get from learning what motivates others is the exposure to the opportunity to open subconscious doors and self discovery that comes with hearing thoughts outside the box where one’s thinking wants to stay cozy and protected from the world. We are, after all, creatures who tend to repeat and let in only the comfortable, the familiar, and shrink from anything new or challenging, unless “motivated” to do otherwise. Some musings by the famous that may help you think, then discover, what your motivation to write might be:

> “You don’t drown by falling in the water; you drown by staying there.” – Edwin Louis Cole

> “What is the feeling when you’re driving away from people, and they recede on the plain till you see their specks dispersing?—it’s the too huge world vaulting us, and it’s good-bye. But we lean forward to the next crazy venture beneath the skies.” – Jack Kerouac

> “I would rather be ashes than dust! I would rather that my spark should burn out in a brilliant blaze than it should be stifled by dry rot. I would rather be a superb meteor, every atom of me in magnificent glow, than a sleepy and permanent planet. The proper function of man is to live, not to exist. I shall not waste my days in trying to prolong them. I shall use my time.” – Jack London

> “Mistakes are the portals for discovery.” – James Joyce

> “Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.” – Thomas Edison

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Like any would-be passion, the real gut check comes when you find yourself choosing to write instead of fixing that broken cabinet door, or running to get a new battery for the watch, or whatever your mind conjuers up through creative procrastination. In Jeff Kirvin’s latest posting on Writing On Your Palm (a site I frequently read which focuses on writing with PDAs), he writes about this common dilemma of good intentions left fallow, and begins with the Stephen King quote out of From a Buick 8: “Passion is the hardest taskmaster.” Jeff concludes, and I do, that this quote speaks to the way King thinks about the writing process as well (haven’t read the book, so I don’t know the context of the quote…but the book is about human obsession and fascination with dangerous things). It is definitely tough to choose to spend time writing versus something more likely to return a tangible result, such as one more todo you can check off the honey-do list, or a task that actually pays sometime within the same decade the task is peformed (any similarity of that statement to speculative writing is purely a coincidence…). But still the passion to write exists in me, or rather I think it does (or perhaps I just want it to be there). I’m not writing every chance I get, nor writing instead of doing something more immediately necessary, nor am I taking the steps to give me more writing time in the future (my weekly contribution to the State of Texas Education Fund—commonly called “Lotto”—notwithstanding). Apparently I’m just not willing to endure the lashings of that taskmaster’s whip…at least, not yet.

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